Obedience training - not just for dogs

Training has begun. Not for a job, not for a tournament…oddly enough, training has begun for my pups. As it turns out, I think they turned the tables on me this time. Allow me to explain.

I have two dogs – a Border Collie and a German Shepherd Hound Mix. Schafer is 6 and Ava is about 3. I’ve had Schafer since 2007 and he had some obedience training. Ava, on the other hand, has little to no obedience training – she is a good dog though. Lately, I’ve been noticing some idiosyncrasies with the both of them. Schafer isn’t coming when he is supposed to, though after a few calls, he comes. Ava, when off leash, just does her own thing and comes when she wants to. She’s also extremely hyper when we come home, or when we pull out the leash. She gets so excited that her tail moves her whole body. Whenever you go to pet her, she just about dies with excitement and can’t wait to kiss you all over. If you’re petting someone else, she will butt right in for pets. Schafer lately has been growling at dogs when we meet them on the street. He’s not being aggressive, but I realized he’s picking up on me and how I react to dogs. He also gets fixated with toys and sometimes I’m afraid that if a small child were to try and play with him, he would play like normal and be too strong for the child. Since we don’t have kids (yet), I can’t really warm either of them up to kids and have them get used to kids on a regular basis. All of these things got me thinking – I need to start a training program.

So, last night, I started reading Cesar Milan’s book about dogs and it was extremely insightful and helpful. I couldn’t put it down. Yesterday and today, I started implementing some of his tips and tricks. It’s only been a matter of hours, but already, I can see signs of improvement. Here are some of the things I’ve been implementing:

1    -  Feeding time: They already know to wait before diving ino their kibble. I’ve now been running my hand into their kibble, while they’re eating so that they know, that Mom is their Alpha.

2    -   Going outside: Yes, it’s tedious and time consuming, but I have them sit before I even open the door. Once I open it, I step outside first, then they follow. This shows them that they are following me, I’m the pack leader (Not to mention it stops the stampede from the ‘who’s going to get outside first rush’)

3   -  Me. They react to my emotions both good and bad. If I am in a bad mood, they will pick up on it, especially Schafer. So yesterday and today, I’ve really worked at keeping a calm, even mood around them. If Ava gets jumpy, I walk away and ignore her. If I’m petting Schafer as a reward for being calm and she gets pushy, I ignore her until she calms down, then I pet her. But through all if it, I am trying to remain as calm as assertive as possible.

These are only a few things I will be implementing in my dogs’ life and structure. They need it – they’re not humans. We can’t treat them as such, even though I love them dearly.

Another thing this training has brought to mind is perhaps how God deals with us sometimes. You see, when we’re given free reign, no boundaries, we either don’t know what to do and get overwhelmed and get bouncy (like Ava) or, we just go our own way with sometimes no consideration for others (Schafer at times). What I’ve begun to realize is that, perhaps, we are in “in training” as well. I look at some of my behaviors and realize that there are things I should modify. Maybe how I act, or how I speak to a specific person. Then I think that maybe God is training me as well. When Schafer or Ava do something wrong, like kick up grass after relieving themselves, they get a collar correction. It’s a tug on the collar, not enough to hurt, with verbal command they associate with “That was wrong”. Eventually, they get it and they don’t do that behavior anymore.  I wonder sometimes if God has been collar correcting me and I haven’t noticed. There are times when I will tell Ava to sit and she doesn’t. She just looks at me. Then, maybe after the 3^rd time, she will do it. It takes so much effort to not get frustrated, angry and stomp off in a huff. That behavior does me no good and it certainly doesn’t do my animals any good. I can’t imagine what it must be like for us as humans to simply tell God no. I know I’ve done it – when there been that little tug in my spirit to do something and I choose not to. It’s also funny to liken Ava’s behavior with ours sometimes. She can get so impatient for that walk or that affection that she pushes and pushes to get it. When this happens I ignore her – I have to. I can’t praise that behavior because she will continue it and will probably get worse. When she has calmed down, I will then give her the affection she so desires. Maybe that’s how God is with us. When we want something SO badly, we jump up and down, do circles, push our way in, to make sure God knows what we want. But He already knows. Maybe he’s waiting for us to calm down (surrender) before we receive it.  Being a Dog Mom is a 24/7 job. It can be tiring. It is a responsibility and yet I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I set out yesterday to train them, to bring about the good behavior that I know resides somewhere in all that fluff. The funny thing is, I think at the end of it, I will also be receiving training from my Alpha and Omega. 

Moving Right Along

I've realized that a lot of my blog posts are titled with something that reminds me of a time in my childhood. This particular title is from "The Muppet Movie". It's a song Kermit and Fozzy sing as they're in their Studebaker, driving in pursuit of a dream. Not only is the song now stuck in my head, but it represents this particular time of life I am in.
Having grown up in Maryland my entire life, the only time I have ever really been anywhere was when I traveled to Germany for a week. It was, no doubt, one of the best experiences of my life and I can't wait to go back. However, another opportunity awaits on the horizon. Without jumping the gun, I'll put it this way - we are most likely moving to Hawaii.

Hawaii.

A place people wait for years to go see. And I could very well become a resident in 3 month.

The thought is so exciting and yet petrifying as well. I have never lived outside of the state of Maryland and this would definitely be pushing the limits. Heck, it's not even within the continental US! I realize it's not a different country, but my goodness, what an amazing experience. Not to mention, I will (prayerfully!!) be joining my big sister once again. I can only imagine that this is a God thing. And God thing are so cool.

So, as of right now, Josh is set to leave in the May time frame and I'm all set to go on June 28th.The reason I can't go until June is because we wanted to get our animals through the prework as it is extensive to get into Hawai'i.

But this changes so much. We leave behind our family, our church, our Judo and Jiu Jistu academies...and so much more. (One of the plus sides is that there's already a "when we are going to visit Catherine Sign-Up Sheet" going around)   :) But I also realize that this is "the norm" for a military family and that's what we will be. I knew what I was signing up for when I said "yes". In a way, I almost feel as if God has prepared me for this. See, Mandy (my big sister) moved to HI in 2009 after we had only been working together about a year. But the bond that grew has stuck and I have missed her greatly. To be able to be close to her again makes my heart leap and sing with happiness. I've also applied to the University of Hawaii and I (think??) I have been accepted. Once there, I will continue my Judo, Jiu Jitsu and my academic pursuit. What I'm most excited about is that I'm not going by myself (although there's absolutely nothing wrong with that). I will be going with my hubby-to-be and I can't think of a better place to begin our married life!

Musings for a Rainy Day

I love my house. I really do. It’s got plenty of space for all of my clutter and square feet upon square feet for my dogs to roughhouse. It sits on a hill in a pretty neighborhood. The neighborhood is still being developed and you can affirm this fact by the sounds of Mack trucks and their diesel engines struggling to drive up that big first hill at 6am on a Saturday morning. But I love my house because it is a safe haven for me. A Place of comfort. A shelter in a storm. I trust that when those winds blow that the engineering that was put into the construction of the house will stand tried and true. And it does.

                How did the construction crew know where to build this house? How did they know that this land was good and solid? Well, someone had to come check it out first. And if you couldn’t tell, I’m taking another ordinary life situation and applying it to the Christian walk. I like to do that, you know, finding parables in this life. I find that it helps me to understand what it means to be a Christian. Anyway, going back to building a house.  I’ve never built one but we did have a project similar to that in Engineering 101. We had to design a laboratory for testing detectors. When I first hear that, I immediately thought “We have to design what to do what??”. Truthfully, the project became clearer as we were halfway through it, but I accomplished the task. We were given a set of requirements and based on those requirements we set out to design this laboratory. We went through different scenarios such as where to build, how far away from the next major city, what kind of land, what kind of materials etc. We had to analyze each part because even in small ways, it could have had a negative effect on our building (hypothetically speaking). What I realized, is that we don’t necessarily realize where we have to put our trust when we become Christians. I may have mentioned this a while back in a post titled “Where is your hope built” but I think it’s good to reinforce this time and time again. As Christians, we realize that our hope and trust needs to be in Jesus. But what does this really mean. You see, when life is good, when things are going our way and it seems like blessings from heaven are just falling like lemon drops and gum drops, it is “easy” to be a Christian. Sure, Trusting Jesus is NO problem if life is like this! But what happens when those lemon drops and gum drops feel like they’ve turned to acid rain? What if it feels like there no escaping the torrent of hail and wind storms that life brings? What happens to your faith then? Does it shake? Does it shatter? This brings me back to the foundation example. Our faith, our trust MUST be rooted in Christ, during good times and bad. When the storms of life strip away our shingles, our sidings, even the contents of ourselves, what is it that will remain standing? The foundation? Or nothing? Sometimes we have to go through trials of fire to reveal our true character. To refine our faith and sharpen our minds.

                When I was in school, one of my subjects was Bible Memory – and I hated that part. Not the Bible, but memorizing bible verses. Let’s face it – I can memorize stupid facts. I can tell you what the gravitational acceleration of a falling body is, I can tell you why oil is liquid at room temperature and why butter is solid at room temperature and so on. What is hard for me to do is memorize stuff that’s really important…like things for school…things that have a grade attached to it. Bible Memory was one. I remember one of my assignments was Proverbs 4. I had some verses memorized and they were completely in the wrong order. See, we memorized 4 verses at a time and recited them at the end of the week. Week 1 was verses 1-4, week 2 was verses 1-8, week 3 was verses 1-12 – you get the idea.then came the week where I had to recite all 28 verses. And it was just. Not. Happening. So my friend who would come over to our house to school while her mom was at work, sat with me and we went through the whole thing verse by verse. Well, I ended up recited it perfectly to my mom and I still remember it today. I guess where I’m going with that is that committing those verses to memory has paid off more than I ever could have imagined. See, when we know stuff, we are able to recall it when we need it (Academic tests are a WAY different story). Same thing with verses. When we are going through a situation, good or bad, we are able to recall verses to mind and hopefully, it helps direct our thoughts. It keeps our minds with a heavenly perspective and doesn't allow the Devil to wear us down. Hebrews 4 says “The Word of God is living and Active, sharper than any double edged sword”

So going back to the house analogy  but where is your foundation built? I know where mine should be but sometimes it takes a few humps along the way to remember that it’s not in my power, strength or self that my foundation is. Being a Christian is a 25/7/365 experience. And I am guilty of making it a “when I need it” experience. A personal relationship with Jesus Christ takes time and commitment just like any other relationship. If there’s one thing God’s been pressing on my heart lately, it’s my lack of being in the Word. I need to be in the Word continually. That way, when my own storms threaten on the horizon, I’m ready.

Entitlement Programs....for Christians??

Ok, first off, let me clarify. There are no entitlements for Christians. I just thought that would be a good title. But seriously, we, as a nation have a lot of programs which are lovingly dubbed "entitlement" programs because the some of the people who benefit from them seem to expect things from that program. I was thinking today about how some people view Christianity in the same light. How the minute you accept Jesus then your life magically gets better. And on top of that, you will receive nothing but blessings and good things because you’re a “Christian”. Or, even (and I am guilty of this as well) that because you’re a Christian, you’re somehow exempt from really terrible things happening to you. Prepare yourselves for a wakeup call, my friends. Because that’s just bogus. It really is.

Just because we’re Christians and accept Jesus into our hearts, DOES NOT exempt us from the bad things in life and also does not guarantee that we will receive blessings all the time. One of the things I have also learned is that, in my Christian walk, if I do not give in the first place, I shouldn’t expect anything in return. Let me clarify. Think of it as a bank (and I heard this concept on a radio broadcast once). You go in and deposit money. Your money earns interest and you can draw on the money because you invested it and it is available for you to use. However, if you do not deposit money, there will be nothing for you to draw on. Philipians 4:19 says that “My God will meet all your needs according to His riches in Glory in Christ Jesus”. If you do not invest your time and effort into God, how can you expect Him to invest His Riches an Glory in you? That might be a little tough of an explanation but it’s meaning is clear.

Another example. Jesus Christ was not exempt from trials and tribulations on this earth either. He went through things that we go through, even today. Why? Because this is a fallen and sinful word. But did he sin? No. He invested into God’s Kingdom and fulfilled His purpose on this earth which was to die for our sins. When we accept Jesus Christ into our hearts, we are not guaranteed a trouble free life. We are guaranteed a trouble free and perfect Heaven. But that time is not now.

Like I mentioned before, I’m just as guilty as the next person. I whine, I complain, I fail at fulfilling my calling. And to some extent, I “expect” good things to happen. And when they don’t, I cry and ask God why these things are happening to me. When good things happen to us, it’s because we serve a good and loving Father who also extends to us Grace. What is Grace? John MacAurthur defines it as “the free and benevolent influence of a holy God operating sovereignly in the lives of undeserving sinners.” Other people have used the pneumonic G.R.A.C.E. – God’s Riches at Christ’s Expense. I personally, like John MacArthur’s version better because in it is a word which really drives this point home. Undeserving. You, me, all of us are underserving of Grace. And yet, when Grace is bestowed upon us, we mistakenly think that it’s because of something we’ve done. Because we go to church every Sunday, or maybe because we give x amount in the offering plate at church. I was reading this very moving story of a couple who lost their infant son at 41 weeks. He was still born. Then about 8 months later, they found out they were pregnant again only to find out that this baby had a severe Chromosomal defect and could very possibly not make it full term or even survive once he was born. I read a few of the Mom’s blogs and they were so moving and so powerful. I’m sure my own feeble “why, God?” didn’t even begin to match their heartbroken questions and pain. Well, She delivered the baby 3 days ago. And he lived for 59 precious minutes. They got to hold him, they got to love him, and then God called him home. This family is a devout Christian family and the Mom’s blog bespeaks of her faith even through this dark and difficult time. We ask why we go through these things and it’s because Christ went through them too. Sometimes it takes a little hardship and pain to remind of the fallen world we live in, our own sinful natures, the God we serve and His immeasurable Grace. Sometimes, some of us have to go through trial by fire to test where the center of our universe is. If it’s anywhere but God, then we have our priorities wrong. He comes first and that should never change. Jesus also said  “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). And that is a promise we can rest on. :)

Words - the food of Love? How about a Language of Love...

I've been thinking about words lately. How words are the building blocks to an acquaintance, a friendship, relationship - well, you get what I'm saying. Sometimes I think words are also like foods. They (the bad foods) can tear us down internally and externally and the good foods can build up up and make us feel great. Imagine that you have a cupboard, full of words. And every morning, you go to pick out your words for the day. Let's assume that you're having a rough week and you go straight for the complaining words (junk food, confort foods), the ones that don't bring out the positive aspects of the situation. Or maybe you/re mad at someone - they've done you wrong and so you choose biting words (foods that taste just awful). Ones that make you feel better but don't necessarily help the situation. Or, you're having a great day and you go straight for the good foods, the ones that make you feel good all over for eating healthy. Well, so it is with our words. 

When we use our words we are essentially expressing thoughts, feelings, emotions. When we are angry we tend to say words and use inflection to convey as such. When we are sad…when we are happy... and so the pattern continues.

If you have ever read “the Five love languages” by Dr. Chapman, you will find that “words of affirmation” are considered one of the “love languages”. When I first read the book, I was struck with how accurate the solution seemed. Find somebody’s love language and when you love them in that way all your problems will disappear. You know what I found out? That’s not the case. Just as with any language, there are many dialects that come with it. The same is true for Love languages.

Words are so powerful to me. I am realizing that now. That I will move heaven and earth if you give me the right affirmation for it. But say two wrongs things and you will have an emotional mess on your hands. I am often struck at how at certain times, when we need it the most, the Holy Spirit will allow Scripture to be recalled to our minds. Tonight’s was: 1^st Corinthians 13:11 “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.” 

Recently, I acted like a child with my words. I reverted to how I used to deal with tough situations as a child. When my mom would come to me and say “Catherine, you did something wrong”, it was like a knife slicing through my heart. Not because she meant it that way, but because words have such an impact on me. The other night was very much the same. I know I could have handled it better. But It is so difficult when words, though not meant cruelly, feel like they are piercing you right and left. I didn't know how to deal with the situation, other than to shut down and mentally resolve to NEVER do anything of the like EVER again (note for clarification: I didn't do anything dreadful, just made wrong assumptions based on miscommunication). Not because I realized I was in the wrong…but because I never wanted to encounter a situation like that again. 

 I will never forget the time we were doing yard work and I pulled up a root which I thought was a weed. Evidently it was a plant that my dad has been tending to. When he saw me with the root in my hand, he exclaimed “Catherine! What are you doing?! I can’t believe you just pulled that up! I was tending to that plant!” and he shook his head in disgust and I felt about 2 cm tall. I mumbled an apology and I went inside the house and cried. I was sorry for what I had done. I surely didn't mean to, I had no malicious intent…but my dad’s words made me feel even worse. I went back outside and tried to apologize buy couldn't because of the lump in my throat. I’m sure my dad doesn't remember the incident…but I do.

And so it is with words and me. They can build me up, or tear me down. They flow within me constantly, always in my head. When I get an inspiration, it is like the words just flow from my fingertips. I can hardly keep up with them. Then there are times when words fail me.

I wonder if words are my vice. If I have finally found that piece of character that really needs refining. Because it is painful. I don’t mind criticism. Don’t get me wrong. If there is a part of my character that needs to be looked at, I will, hopefully humbly, receive what someone has to say to me. But when it’s a direct “you did this wrong”  there is something about that phrase, whether spoken or implied that just cuts me to the core. I can’t explain it. And the only way I know how to deal with it is to, like I said, never tread down that particular path again.

Why is it that I have such a hard time with that? And why is it that I react so childishly to it? Is it because I never learned any other way to deal with it? Is this something I’m stuck with for life? I definitely don’t like this aspect of myself. I also get hung up on the “well, I’m doing this for you so you should be doing this for me”. But that too, in and of itself, is selfish. It’s a very inward perspective. When I realize these things about myself, I feel so wretched, so dirty, so unworthy. I hate who I am and I desperately wish I could turn back time and take back those times, those instances so I wouldn't be plagued with the memory of them now. But I can’t. And if I could, there would be no reason for Grace. See, if we could magically erase all the stupid things we've said or done, or go back and change the past, then there would have been no need for Jesus to die on the cross. We could make our lives what we want them to look like, rather than face them for what they are. I don’t like my sins, I don’t like how it makes me feel, but it is a good (albeit painful) reminder of how desperately I need a Savior. And how immeasurable His grace is. And that it is ALWAYS there, any time I need it. All I need to do is to be humble enough to ask for it.  

From Blog to Book?

Sometimes I wonder what "Divine Inspiration" is. I think that it's different for each person, but I believe in it all the same. Some folks scoff at the idea of anything being "divinely' inspired. They might think it's a bunch of rubbish. But I believe that it how god communicates with us. He puts things on our hearts or our minds and using scripture to feel that spiritual seedling. The thing that's been most on my mind is writing a book. Using the posts from this blog and putting all these thoughts together into a collection of lessons God has taught to me. And the thing that has been sitting most vividly in my mind as a title is "More Than Enough". Because is it so true. Both in God's case, and ours. We are more than enough for God - He made us, He called us, He has a purpose for us - we are the clay and He is the Potter. Likewise, He is More than enough for us. He is Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. God is Love, our first Love. I could go on and on. With these two truths in mind, I would focus on a major problem we encounter in the United States - Self-image and Self-worth. I can tell you from experience that it's hard not to harshly judge yourself when you look at the magazine rack at the store. Beautiful women, with seemingly perfect bodies, perfect skin, beautiful makeup - you walk away thinking "Gosh I wish I looked like that!" or "Welp, Diet starts today!". But behind the lens of the camera that took that picture is a far from perfect woman. Makeup, Hair Products, Photo shop - all those items were used to create that "perfect" picture. What if we started to look at ourselves through the Lens of the Bible and not through the world? What if we took a deep breath and really evaluated ourselves through the eyes of God and Scripture? I think you'd be pleasantly surprised at the results. See, unlike the world, there are no size requirements. There's no skin tone or color, weight, jean size, shoe size, hair color specifications etc. When we accept Jesus into our hearts, the Bible tells us we are as white as snow. Remember waking up to snow some morning, before it's been messed up by road salts and shovelers? It's perfect isn't it :) Well, when we are right with God, we are washed in the Blood of the Perfect Savior - and that is enough to come to God. In fact, that's the only way to come to God. Through the blood of the lamb. In the Old Testament, not just any lamb would do. A Lamb for sacrifice had to be spotless, without blemishes. Likewise, Jesus, had to be perfect, without blemishes. Now, I'm not talking about acne - I'm talking about the blemishes that come when we sin. And he did not sin.
Another focus I might take is one of finding our self-image in God. You can't just read "He is more than Enough". You have to believe it. When you believe it, when your trust is completely in Him, When HE Is Your All, your first Love, than you are what I like to call, Grounded in Christ. Planted on a rock that will never be shaken. There is a huge problem with this in our country. We are told that we will not be happy unless we have this amazing tablet or newest smart phone. That because our current one is slower and less functional, that we will suffer until we pay huge amounts of money to upgrade. That unless we're a size 0 with a 5% body fat, that we will never be truly happy with our bodies. That unless we are leaning on a man's arm, no matter who he is or where he's from or what he believes, that we will never find true happiness. That it's ok to throw morals and values away, all for the sake of a little romance. How sad for the young women in generations to come! I can't stress this enough! IF you are grounded in Christ than all of those other things do not and should not matter! Because we can never be TRULY happy unless we choose to have happiness in Christ. I am often struck with how often I wondered "who I was". There are people who go on massive "spiritual" journeys, to holy places or remote lands, to find themselves. What I have found, is that you will "find yourself" when you ask God to reveal your purpose. I think that people who are in search of who they are, are really in search for their purpose or meaning in life.  Not everyone is going to have the same purpose. It's just not possible. If everyone in a car plant did the same thing, nothing else would be accomplished. There is no way we can each have the same purpose. Going back to some old thoughts from a recent post, we are His workmanship. He uses us, our talents, our abilities, to further His kingdom. He's coming back one day and only he knows when. Matthew 24: 36 says " ³⁶ “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father." We are to be prepared at all times. We are to give an account for the hope that is within us. 1st Peter3:15 "¹⁵ But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect," My Pastor challenged my Sunday School class to write out their testimony, having it be no longer than 3 minutes. What's your testimony? What was your life before Christ? I know I've covered a lot of topics but I can't wait to begin to compile these thoughts and see where God takes them and uses them. My prayer is that He uses my gifts for His purpose and His kingdom. :) 

The Rainbow Connection

Did you ever play the game called Life? The one where you started out with you in  a car and along the way, your "life" was determined by the cards you were dealt. Your job, how many Kids you had, whether you were successful or not - All of those things rested in the hands of the dealer and the "luck of the draw". Too often I hear phrases such as "well, that's how the cards were dealt" or, "it's just not in the cards for me"  and I can't help but think how awful it is if people really think that their life is analogous to a game of cards.   Proverbs 3:5-6 says "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.(Or make your paths straight)" I wrote another blog post dissecting this verse..you can read it here. But I think the most important part of that verse is "Trust in the Lord with all you heart...and he will make your paths straight."

I have seen the truth of this verse in my own life many, many times. The more I trust my ways to God and rely on Him and not my own understanding, He makes it clear to me that path I should go. One misconception about Christians is that we have a "perfect" life and that is not the case at all. We are all sinners - every last one of us. The difference between true followers of Jesus Christ and those who are lost, is that His followers have a relationship with Him and long to conform to His image. It is not enough to go to church, to know who God is, to acknowledge His existence, all the while not pursuing a relationship with Him. But I digress.

Unlike the game of Life, our paths are not determined by cards or luck. They are ultimately determined  by the choices we make. Whether to take this job or move to this city - these decisions impact and sometimes alter our course through life. And an interesting facet of these courses are the people we meet as we go along. Some are friends, some are acquaintances and it is these relationships that shape who we become as people. Have you ever met someone who had such a huge impact on you that you found it hard to forget them. I think we can all say we have had that experience, or as I like to call it "Rainbow Connection". (Rainbow Connection being a friend or aquaintance whom you believe God has purposfully placed in your life for a sepcific reason, a promise of His faithfulness) It has happened many times throughout the course of my life. Each stage of life I have had, has simply set me up for a better and greater chapter than the one before. And some of the doors have been opened and closed by the relationships that I have begun and also ended. Each and every one has served a purpose or is still serving a purpose. I don't know where it leads, but it is an amazing thing to watch. To think that a Job interview in 2009  (that I almost turned down), would lead to meeting my true spiritual sister as well as friends and acquaintances that would lead to a government internship. That internship, in turn led to meeting another dear friend (one to whom I feel great attachment because of some things she is going through). Through her, I would meet the man I am currently in a relationship with, a man I prayed for (with specifics) and God met every single one of my requests. Through this relationship and his loving me enough to have a heart to heart with me about what my pasisons are, I have realized that the last four years of working in an engineering environment was a means to an end, not my end...but God's end. I am not meant to be an engineer. Can I do it? Absolutely. But my calling is elsewhere and it involves the use of my hands. It has not yet been revealed to me how to use them in a specific manner, but I am on that path by now pursuing a degree in Kinesiology with supplemental focuses on massage therapy, Personal training, sports injuries and nutrition. The way God has used the experiences in my life, the lessons both good and bad, is truly amazing and astounding. How God can make a beautiful picture of what I thought was a horrid mess (my life) is beyond my comprehension. That fulfillment I longed for I have now found because I am living for God's Purpose, not my own. But that only happens when we are willing to trust our futures, our cares, our happiness into His hands. When we truly come to Him and say "Lord, I am yours, use me as you will" He does that and much more.

 If you are following the will of God, I truly believe that He brings across your path people who make a difference in your life as well as people in whose life you can make a difference. In Romans 9 it says "21 Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for special purposes and some for common use?". I realize this may sounds harsh and contrary to the belief that God is a fair God..but it also says in Ephesians 2: 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."

And if I may highlight the word "workmanship" The following definition comes from gospel.com: Christians are God's workmanship--tools uniquely designed by God to fulfill a specific purpose. We can rejoice in the knowledge that we are wonderfully made for a reason, and that God continues to work with us throughout our lives. The Greek word for Workmanship is POIEMA. Does that sound familiar? We get the word Poem from Poiema. Poems are typically looked at as masterpieces or even some "works of art" . So you see, we are God's "works of art", created for His purpose and ultimately, His glory. It is not our good works that save us though. We are saved FOR good works, or "saved to serve". James 2: 18 "But someone will say, "You have faith, and I have works." Show me your faith without your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. 19 You believe that there is one God. You do well. Even the demons believe-and tremble! 20 But do you want to know, O foolish man, that faith without works is dead?... 26 For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also." Going back to what I said earlier - it is not enough to go to church and be a spiritual statue. It is not enough to say "Yes, I believe in God". We are called, we are commanded to love the Lord our God with all of our hearts, our souls and minds. And second to that we are called to love our neighbors as ourselves.

Do you have a special purpose? Or are you for common use? I like to think that if God calls as we listen, we can find our special purpose to further His kingdom. For some it may be in ministry, others, maybe raising their kids in the home. We each have a job to do and the only way to find that job is to open your heart and your ears to the Spirit of God as He guides you down the path of Life He has for you.