"When the waves are taking you under...."

** Disclaimer: This particular blog is going to me made up of mostly ramblings. Kudos to you if you can follow my thought pattern... :) **

"Hold on just a little bit longer, believe me this is gonna make you stonger..."

I love the song "Stronger" by Mandisa. Sometimes I hear it right when I need it the most. 

This week has been good and bad. It's Spring Break which gives me a nice staycation, so to speak, from school and the crazy schedule I've had for the past 2 and a half months. On the other hand, everything that I've put on the back burner has suddenly jumped forth and needs attention. Yesterday, I got so overwhelmed. Overwhelmed with decisions that didn't need to be made right then, with consequences that hadn't happened yet and frankly may not happen, with situations and scenarios that I create in my head etc. While it never hurts to be prepared, it's not always a good thing to focus on the "What ifs". I find that my attention is focused on the "what ifs" in life and that's not always a good thing.. It's rather detrimental actually. By focusing on the what ifs and letting worry consume your life, you're ultimately taking your eyes off Jesus and the results are never good. Again and again, I'm reminded that in order to leave a peaceful life, Christ has to be the center of it. No matter what situation you're going through.

I read a quote that in order to be lifted up, you have to first lift someone else up. Going back to being the sunshine in someone else's life.

I also read the purpose driven life once. It seemed to allude that after reading it your purpose would suddenly become clear. I used to think that it would outright tell me: Catherine, your purpose is ______. It didn't.  So what is my purpose? Frankly, I don't know. But, life's questions aren't always answered that easily. I'd like to think it's in ministry somewhere, but I've never delved deep enough into a ministry to find out for sure. It's kind of like college I suppose. Sometimes you start the curriculum for your major and suddenly find out that you really hate the lower level classes. Or maybe that Bio course was just not for you. So you swtich majors, swtich classes until you find something that fits you. I feel so focused on my own life, my own goals and dreams...that I fail to seek or even sieze opportunities to help other people find theirs. I've seen friends give up job security, leave family and friends, move thousands of miles away to serve the Lord in the capacity He has placed in front of them. My question to myself is, would I be strong enough to do that if an opportunity ever presented itself?