I love my husband. He is the man I prayed for, longed for, hoped for, for almost two years. (I know, it doesn't seem like a very long time, but for me, it felt like eternity).
We had kind of a whirlwind relationship beginning. We met in March on 2012 at Children's Hospital (neither of us were injured) and we started hanging out and then dating about two months later at the end of April. By December we were engaged and then married in a small ceremony in January for legal and military purposes. Our main ceremony was this past April, almost one year to the day that he asked me out.
Over the past year, we have continued to get to know each other, to recognize strengths and weaknesses, what makes each other tic, and most importantly, each other's love languages. I was telling my best friend the other day that she is lucky in her husband's love language - his being quality time. If Josh's love language were quality time, it would be easy! But God knows me well - and he gave me a husband whose love language requires me to think outside the box, become unselfish and also combat one of my greatest weaknesses - a tendency to laziness. Now, when I say laziness it doesn't denote that I'm not a hard worker. If I have a goal, I put forth my best effort to ensure the goal is met and to the best of my ability. No, I'm talking about laziness in the little things - such as leaving a trail of clothes on the floor because I'm too lazy to put it in the hamper. Or leaving a trail of water bottles because emptying them and taking them downstairs isn't the first thought on my mind. Now, eventually these messes will get cleaned up, but they sit there for a while before they get on my nerves and I take care of them. Josh, being in the military, is used to a relatively neat and clean environment. His love language is also Acts of Service. Acts of Service being home-made dinners (no problem there!), the room being picked up and neat, the house being picked up and neat etc. Now, I'm not by any means saying that picking up and cleaning is "my job" or my duty alone. We both share the responsibility of keeping our house clean. We have it worked out well for the kitchen. I'll make the meal and we'll both clean up, or he'll clean up and tell me to go sit on the couch and put my feet up. :) But in keeping the house clean, or initiating the laundry are all acts of service to him that make him feel loved and appreciated. Coming home to a clean house and a warm home cooked meals speaks more "I love you"s than a handwritten note or a lengthy email stating how much I love him.
More recently, I feel as if I have been lacking in the Acts of Service Department. It has been difficult the past few months as the early stages of pregnancy have hit me kind of hard. Battling low iron and constant tiredness have made it hard to complete anything except the necessities: dinner, school work etc.
So on Friday, I decided it was going to be Love Josh Day. As in, clean the room, straighten up the bed, pick up the clothes, start the laundry etc. I had this whole grand list of ideas of things I could do in the hours before he got home. Even though I wanted to take a nap, I chose to fight through and make my husband feel loved. So, I started out by dumping the hamper of sheets and towels that had been sitting on our floor for a week and folded and put them away. Check #1. Then, I dumped out the hamper of my clothes that had also been sitting on my floor for a week and folded them. Check #1.5 The other .5 check would have been to put them away which I forgot to do because I went downstairs to start dinner. I also made the bed and picked up the clothes and finally discovered that we did indeed own a carpet under all that mess.... (I kid, it wasn't really that bad). So I started diner which consisted of making homemade pizza. When Josh got home, I was in the process of rolling the dough and putting the fixings on it. I had also made a homemade pizza sauce too. Josh went upstairs to change and I felt so proud of myself and hoped he would notice the clean room, the newfound carpet and come down with sparkles in his eyes. I quickly forgot about these hopes as I put dinner in the oven. As we were sitting at the table waiting for the pizza to cook, I asked him "Did you see the room?" with hopeful expectation in my voice.
"Oh, you mean all the clothes on the bed? Yep, I saw them alright."
Drat.
I had forgotten to go back upstairs and put away the folded laundry. But he was just messing with me and knew that I had put in effort to clean the room. It may not have worked out as well as I wanted, but the effort and meaning were still there.
That's one of the many reason why I love him. Because when I am weak he is strong and vice versa. During the past few months, he has been on of my biggest fans and supporters as I continue to pursue my BS as well as grow a baby. He will tuck me into bed for a desperately needed nap on the weekend and then spend several hours cleaning or doing yard work. He comes home every night with a smile on his face and a "thank you" for dinner (which he knows Word of Affirmation is my love language).
He is a wonderful man, with a big heart and I'm so thankful he is mine to keep. When they say, Love isn't just a feeling, they are right. Love is a choice, it is a commitment, and it takes work. But done in the right way and with the right mindset and with the help of God, you can make Love last a lifetime. That is what I intend to do, till death do us part.
